April 07, 2011

More on Yearning

Thank you WordGirl and Layla for your comments...

I know, WordGirl, that you get it, that reaching for something unnamed, unattainable (or so it seems)...

Lately, I've been getting that Wanderlust, wondering just how I could possible carry out a trip to some exotic locale with 3 children 5 and under - bike across South America, like a family I read about last summer, or hike the Appalachian Trail from tip to tail, or explore every National Park, or search for the family that I know is somewhere in Italy, somewhere in England, Ireland, Scotland, Sweden, Germany...head back East and introduce my children to the life in NYC and all things Jersey...find those roots...

I know that this is in part due to the fact of being at home so much lately - trying to keep our spending down means using the bicycles when weather permits, and only driving when absolutely necessary, which means a lot of time spent at home being creative with the kids for activities.

I feel as though I'm stuck in this endless rut of wash the clothes, fold the clothes, put them away, clean the floors and counters, make the beds, tuck people into bed, change diapers, wipe noses/faces/hands, make a meal, clean up the meal and over and over again...with no sign of any progress - I feel as though I'm the one stuck rolling the boulder up the hill over and over again.

I know that's a part of my "job" as at-home parent, but sometimes I wonder just what happened to the girl I was in college - with the zest for new things, exploring, all things an adventure, all things wonderful, new, fresh...and some days I forget that I need to look at life through the eyes of Captain, who, at almost 5, is wondering just how everything works and why, or those of Princess, newly 3, who sees everything as romantic and lovely and beautiful, or even of Littlest One, just a year old, learning things for the first time - figuring out cause and effect.

Some days I just need that reminder that mine is a purpose much farther reaching then the end of the day.

1 comment:

FarmWife said...

you hit the nail on the head with this one, sister. It's hard to see the big picture when your day is made up of wiping noses and bottoms and washing everything in sight.

There are days when I want to toss my tooth brush & Zune in a bag and hit the road. Maybe that's what retirement is for.