Oh, sure, he admits that sees all that I do, and recognizes that I work my butt off, but still...there are times when I feel I have to justify myself to him, and explain that I can't just leave the kids to their own defenses during the day...after all, they're only 28 1/2 months and 9 months old! And now that Tiny Princess is following me everywhere I go, I have to be really careful again with what I do when she's awake...not that I'm cooking up meth in my kitchen or anything, but I don't want to be up to my elbows in a project if she whacks her head on my dishwasher door, or gets her fingers pinched in a drawer...
So, some days I find myself truly sitting on my rear in front of the computer or television most of the day watching my shows, catching up on my Interwebedness, and then, about an hour before BB gets home, I run around like a crazy person vacuuming, sweeping, making dinner, scrubbing counters, sinks and toilets...
The funny thing is that I know that if I told BB that I just didn't feel like doing something, he'd just shrug and be like "That's Ok. I know you'll get it done."
So why do I feel like I have to be this amazing super-woman that can cook 3 meals daily, have all laundry and ironing done, all things picked up, put away, shined and polished, and all traces of a hard day put aside when he gets home?
OY!
I still blame it on this:
The Good Wife's Guide
- Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.
- Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
- Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
- Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.
- During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
- Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.
- Be happy to see him.
- Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
- Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
- Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
- Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.
- Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
- Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
- Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
- A good wife always knows her place.
2 comments:
I understand, honey. It's all a mind game we play with ourselves.
I'm with you on this one. My husband keeps telling me that he knows I need more rest, and he knows I'm now fighting a cold or something. But at the same time, he also admitted that he's worried about the fact that we still have boxes everywhere, that he's anxious when clutter (boxes) is present, and basically intimated that I need to get those boxes unpacked asap. He's a contradiction in terms sometimes, and my own ridiculous guilt factor rears it's ugly head too often during the day.
If we could edit the guide to say...."A good wife gives herself permission to take a nap or read a book so that she's not pissy when her husband gets home. And a good wife sometimes admits to her husband that she needs a break from cooking so that she doesn't lose motivation entirely in the kitchen. Oh, and a good wife sometimes lounges around all day while her children play in their pajamas because she doesn't want to turn her children into little driven perfectionists who will eventually need counseling to get rid of their quirks."
Post a Comment